tl;dr: Now
I mean – it’s such a scary question – ‘cos it makes me wonder – shit – if I’m not feeling “fully” alive – what the fuck am I doing with my life? Is there a difference between feeling alive and fully alive – and if so – what should we be doing about it?
Right now I feel alive – I’m aware of my senses and my position in space – I can imagine and feel and act and manifest – I’m certainly not asleep (I don’t think,) and maybe I am in a simulation, but as far as “alive”goes – I pretty much feel it.
In the recent past I have felt many of the highs of being alive – things that you don’t normally experience in your day to day life – things that are literally remarkable; time with visiting family, trips to beautiful places, eating fabulous food followed by live concert performances, unexpected intimacy as well as the power of a crowd – all these things enhanced my experience of living but did I feel “fully” alive?
I cast my mind back a few years – to a rental car on a stupid road – no barrier to a death drop of hundreds of meters and a terrified partner – forcing myself to focus and not succumb to panic. When the road finally opened up, the overwhelming feeling of relief was electric – my body felt on fire and I did indeed feel “fully” alive – we both did.
I suspect this is similar to the feeling that people get when they bungee jump or throw themselves out of an airplane – it’s the feeling of being close to death that amplifies the feeling of being alive.
I’ve never felt the need to feel “fully” alive – the “cost” of being terrified just for an adrenal rush never made sense – and while sure it does feel good, it’s more often than not accompanied by a come down that leaves one dissatisfied and searching for the next high – I have enough addictive behaviors to be wary of this one.
And so for me – right now – there is no “more alive” state that I would want to be in – I don’t feel like I’m missing out – I in fact feel pretty satiated – I feel pretty “full” – I do – just by living – already feel fully alive!
This article is part of The Human Collective. Each week we take a prompt and create a playlist and accompanying articles. This week we’re wondering when was the last time you felt fully alive? Check out the playlist: Songs That Make You Feel Alive Learn more about The Human Collective here.
Image by Andrew
About the Curators
Andrew
The first visual memory I have is that of the white upright piano in Singapore, Hell and the Dark Forces lived at the bottom, Heaven and the Angels at the top, they would play battles through my fingers and I was hooked.
As a psychology graduate I studied how sound affects human performance.
As a musician I compose instrumental music that stimulates your brain but doesn't mess with your language centers, leaving you free to write creatively without distraction.
As a curator I research how music can improve your life and create flow - I can tell you what music to listen to when studying for a test and why listening to sad music can make you feel better.
As a creator / contributor at musicto I believe that music can make the world better.
What I'm doing now
